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  • So you're saying that you lost your virginity today to that girl. You're either the most insensitive human being or a liar. - Matt Nathanson

  • Are you drinking scope? - Matt Nathanson

  • Do you have some form of tourettes where you yell out stupid disney movies. White Fang!! Herbie the Love Bug!!! Gus the Field Kicking Mule!! - Matt Nathanson

  • "I have sort of a personal question to ask you but I'll wait. I'll wait 'til you feel a little more comfortable, a little more tranquil. Oh, it's gonna be good. It revolves around...I can't even, I can't even hint. It's cruel to hint. I'll just tell - Matt Nathanson

  • You guys are fantastic. Fantastic. Cleveland. Who knew? I mean, *I* knew. - Matt Nathanson

  • Did you say something about your underwear? You're wearing women's underwear? I'm sure you feel much more well-endowed?you know, the way the fabric sits. Let me show you. We're all here, we're all making a connection here. - Matt Nathanson

  • I have my cell phone in my pocket, that is awful. Let's turn the ringer off, shall we? It's on vibrate, imagine during the set I just? I'm like, yeeeaaah. You're like, ?Matt had a really good time during Weight of it All - Matt Nathanson

  • This song was originally written about my sexual, my blow-up doll. But I thought that was fucked so I changed it. So this is about a fake woman. - Matt Nathanson

  • My question for you revolved around this ?and I'm totally serious and then I'm gonna play like the most devastatingly serious song I have because that's how I roll. This is a question ?and I'm gonna ask it as PG as I can so as to not often - Matt Nathanson

  • White Fang? That movie? That Disney movie White Fang? About the dog and the kid and the snow? Is that the fuckin a thing you're yelling? You get an opportunity to yell and you yell White Fang? What the fuck is wrong with you? - Matt Nathanson

  • This is a new song. Some of you might be afraid of it, much like you might be afraid of a new sexual position your partner wants to try. But in that situation you can either be the reed in the river, let your legs go where they maybe. - Matt Nathanson

  • Hero? ?Would you cry, if you saw me crying? Would you poop if I was pooping too? I'm amazed at how much my Enrique Iglesias voice sounds like Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. That's why the poop thing came in. Oooookay. 2nd grade humor. - Matt Nathanson

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